Adventures with Alma. 5 days out of the last 10.

Yesterday a dear dear friend left to return home to Albuquerque, New Mexico. Since she arrived I have been out every night. For a girl that didn't think she had much of a social life and over the years has been called a Nana (more than once), I think I've done pretty good at staying alive for the last two weeks. Looking back I have had an amazing time, with amazing people, in amazing places. So this is how it went...

Wednesday 6 November

My new friend arrived.

This kinda looks like us, me and Alma, but with the skin colour reversed

My new friend (Alma) arrived on Thursday. I went to meet her, another friend and my boyfriend at a cafe. I was anxious. When I saw her, her face was beaming, she was literally grinning from ear to ear and embraced me as though we were long lost friends. I was instantly comfortable and myself. We didn't stop talking until she left.

Most Wednesday's I go to a bar in town called the Hangar. It opened on a Wednesday and my friend and I went on the first night and have been going there since it opened. We sit at the bar and have a few drinks while we catch up with whoever comes in to join us. It's nice to spend time with friends and the boys that run the bar are incredibly hard workers & make beautiful drinks. They love what they do and they are good at it. 

This Wednesday was my friend's birthday so we were joined by lots of his friends. It got quite rowdy; some people made a human pyramid, a girl fell off. She's a bit of a dick so I quite enjoyed that bit. I stayed till midnight to say happy birthday (because it was actually Thursday) then I went home.

Thursday 7 November

Thursday night we went to the opening of Kowhiti. Alma was here in Aotearoa looking after the dance group from New Mexico: Dancing Earth so got us tickets to the opening night of the contemporary Maori dance festival. My first glimpse of Dancing Earth was through the window from the balcony. One dancer was bound, twisted in rubbish, one wore a gas mask and the other played a violin. They wore striking blue.

This picture is taken from the balcony before the show began. I look totally unimpressed with Tamahou's story, I probably wasn't, it was probably more that the camera was right in our face.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/us_embassy_newzealand/10731087615/sizes/m/in/photostream/

The performances were brilliant. Dancing Earth and Mas from the Torres Strait Islands stole the show. Dancing Earth opened the show and after it I felt as though I had been to New Mexico and back. Their narrative about the value of water, conservation, people's effect on the land and culture was powerful. I saw the creatures, felt the land under my feet and heard their pleas to understand their plight. 

Mas from the Torres Strait Islands danced like a bird. His feet quick quick quick as he brought his ancestors to the stage. 

The other piece that struck me was one by Louise Potiki-Bryant. Her piece Kiri, a conversation between a piece of clay and a clay artist was sophisticated and subtle yet every movement left me breathless. At one stage I couldn't hold it in and yelled, she's a hei tiki, look! 

You can see pictures of the Kowhiti performance on the US Embassy's page at the link above.

Friday 8 November

On Friday I got to see two on my fav people in the world. These two have taught me more about myself than they will ever know. I hope we stay friends forever.

At night Alma, the BF and I went to a really cool fundraiser. Our friends helped organise a haangi (google it) and entertainment for their daughter's kohanga reo (Maori Language learning nest for preschoolers). One of my fav singers Ria Hall was performing and I love haangi. Actually, the haangi we had was the best one I've ever had in Wellington. We got to hang with cool people, eat good food and listen to good music. It was choice and for such a cool cause. 

Saturday 9 November

I got up early to take the BF to work and got to go to the supermarket by myself on a Saturday morning (it's something I like to do). I then went home, got Alma and we went to Te Papa to hang with Dancing Earth and the Kowhiti whanau.

Alma and I went shopping and we met Shane one of the dancers from Albuquerque. We all went to the market and we laughed and I talked and talked and talked. I hope I meet him again. He features more in Sunday's story. 

I didn't know but there was a workshop on at Te Papa being run by Dancing Earth. Of course, I couldn't not take part so I took off my shoes and started the workshop with Rulan, the choreographer & instructor for Dancing Earth. Although I had bad pants on (tight jeans) and every time I bent over my ass crack smiled at the sky, I let go of all inhibition and surrendered to Rulan and her lesson.

She taught us how to not step on the grass, to step with intention and to breathe through our bodies to the land beneath us. Part of the lesson involved getting into a group of three and being the holy trio of food; beans, corn and squash. I was a corn, and a sexy corn at that. I may have even found my calling.

After the workshop we were treated to a performance by one of the Dancing Earth family, Ria Thundercloud. Ria danced the dance of her ancestors. It was magical and beautiful, like this picture.

That night we went to the NZ Poetry Slam. Holey shit, how did I now know about this before. For those not in the know, people recite poems and they are judged by random members of the crowd, the highest and lowest scores are taken away and then the remaining scores are added to get a winner of each "round". They battle till they have a winner.

We arrived late, the bar was packed and people were clicking fingers to show they liked what was being said over the mic. We arrived for the semi-finals and what we witnessed was nothing short of astounding. Long story short, the three finalists were all young men; Michael from Dunedin (who I stalked when I was at school), Michael from Hamilton (a handsome Maori fulla) and the winner, Te Kahu also from Hamilton (also a handsome Maori fulla). They spoke about Mother's being beaten to death, about playing league to impress the father that beat you, about the dickhead your girlfriend likes that makes you look good as a boyfriend, about property agents as the scum of the earth, about the sucken ship that wreaked his home but bought his people together, about being men that write poetry. 

We were there with some amazing people and if all these young people are the future of our country then that is just fine by me.

Sunday 10 November

Just when I thought it couldn't get any better, my week was completed with a day full of all the things I love. As I say, Sunday's are for doing the things that matter, with the ones that you love.

But wait, there's more.

I'm entirely aware that I have not blogged the last 3 days of dresses from the stash. Rest assured, I wore them, they were amazing & and I have good stories to tell. I'll post a blog entry tonight, but until then, here is a picture of one of the stars of the last few days of the challenge: a baby blue vintage number bought from under a mountain. 

 

I wore over 31 dresses over 31 days and by the end of it all I was quite over getting my picture taken in them. While I started out with the same pose and serious face, this picture shows how much I didn't care by the end, booty out, in the doorway. 

The mourning gown

This was the day Lou Reed died, this was the day I walked in the bush and this was the day I wore a floral dress. It was Labour Day 2013 and we spent the day with a dear friend in the Wairarapa.

 

In the morning we woke up to the news that Lou Reed had died. It was all over facebook and people that I never thought would be fans were posting about him and his music. We listened to Lou for a good few hours and I read bits and pieces from this autobiography. He lived in a time of such liberation and freedom yet he had to constrain so much of who he was. It made me think that I am so blessed to live in a world where I can be me, just me, who ever I want to be.  

After we listened to Lou Reed and ate breakfast and read books we drove up the road to Fensham Reserve near Carterton. Walking through the reserve is like walking through loads of different types of bush. There is a swampy bit with Kahikatea, a fernery with mamaku and ponga, a grassy bit, and an amazing dense section with totara and matai. My favourite bit was a bit of the track where you felt as though the trees were hugging you as you walked along the narrow path. What makes this bush so cool is that there are loads of signs around telling you what the trees are; like a living classroom. There were loads of birds around and at one stage we got followed along by tirairaka (fantail). As we walked along my boyfriend picked pikopiko, also known as bush asparagus. 

 I love being in the bush, I love being outside and walking, I often forget how much I love it.

I got this dress in Napier from a big big op shop. I had been in Napier for the week at Kura Reo, a week long total immersion Maori language course, after my boyfriend came to get me we stopped at the op shop on the way to a cafe for lunch. When I went to order my lunch I did it in Maori without noticing. I had to turn my brain back into English and it was the most incredible feeling. If you don't speak a language you soon loose it. My boyfriend doesn't really like speaking Maori to me (it's his first language) so I feel as though slowly, it is slipping out of my head, and one day it might just disappear. I know my teacher would be disappointed in me as he believed and taught us that no matter how little we should still use it, and often. He used to tell us about how when he was driving he would practice his speeches to the dead by doing them to the road kill. It was silly but made so much sense. There is a great whakatauki (proverb) that I always go back to in my life that kinda works to sum up my little rant about my uselessness about speaking Maori and my love of the bush. 

Ko te manu kai i te miro, nona te ngahere. Ko te manu kai i te matauranga nona te ao.

The bird who eats the berry gains the forest. The bird that consumes knowledge gains the world.

Sunday - A day for doing the things that matter.

Today was a good day. As I said in an earlier post, Sundays are for doing the things that matter with the ones you love.

We started our Sunday by going to the food market down on the Wellington waterfront. It's such a cool place, people gather to buy vegies, herbs, tofu and hot food. A boat sells whole fish where you can have it filleted right before your eyes. All sorts of people gather at the market; it's a vegie filled melting pot.

After the market we went to the National Irish Feis for the second day, I watched my first game of hurling and supported our young Club members (I'm the Secretary of the Hutt Valley Irish Society) perform their story telling entries. I took my whanau with me today and it was nice to have company.

I entered the oratory section, I entered a month ago and entered in the hope that it would encourage more entries. I hadn't prepared anything as I didn't want the stress but I had intended to speak about the Irish Society as my marae. Once I got there I was told the topic was a prolific Irish figure. Lucky I had the letter I wrote to my ancestor in my bag. I spoke about my Great Uncle, William Arthur Ham, the first New Zealander to die in the First World War. He was born in Bray, Ireland.

I "competed" against one of my fellow Club members, he is one of my favourite members, he wears Sein Fein "Free Ireland" t.shirts, he is warm and kind and his speech was about Gerry Adams. As the adjudicator said, it was a real history lesson. It was an honour to stand beside him and "compete". My friend has a stutter and when he does public speaking it just disappears. It's magic.

Not a dress but how good does this look.

After my speech (yes Laura, I got a medal) we went over the hill to the Wairarapa to visit a very dear friend. He has a beautiful home (an old villa he moved) on his ancestral land and grows kai, looks after chickens, collects books and has pet tuna (eels); it's a perfect mix. The heart of the home is his coal range which I'm standing in front of. I love my friend and when I go to his home I can't help but think about my Dad and how this is how I know he would love to live. We made our dinner of meat, kumara and our own damper over the open fire under the stars. It's a type of paradise. In fact, I saw a shooting star & I didn't say anything, you always know when I'm spell-bound because I go very quiet.

Two pumpkins.

I got this dress from a friend of mine. She was selling some stuff and gave me this dress for free! I love it because it came from a friend and because I can pull it on and run around and feel naked. It's so light and wonderful for summer. One year I wore it on Christmas day and my (way cooler than me) brother and sister made me wear it with the skirt pulled up so the shirt like bit hung over the waist band bit. I wear it how it feels comfortable, and this is how. Yeah, suck on that siblings.

Great story, great dress.

One year Karen Walker was having a $150 sale. Everything in the store was $150 or under. I went in, probably the first time I had been in there, and spotted this dress from across the room. I was determined it would fit and that I would buy it. I tried it on and walked out to the bigger mirror. Well, you should have seen the look on the girl's face. Oh, she said, that wasn't meant to be out. Someone else came out of the changing room and said, that looks great, jealous I didn't see it. I looked back at the shop-girl and honestly thought she was going to vomit. I took the dress off, took it up to the counter and as the girl took it over the counter I saw the original tag. The dress was originally $957. I don't think it was meant to be sold in the sale.

For ages I didn't know where to wear this dress and as it's silk I was a little too afraid to wear it. I think I wore it once before I got a boyfriend who hated the dress, for years it hung, never to be worn. After a while I decided it had to be sold on, so I put it one last time and came down the stairs to where my new (and current) boyfriend sat. He gasped and said, how come I have never seen this dress?! You look amazing. And that was that. It quickly became the go to party dress and has had some pretty good outings. Every time I wear it someone says how much they love it. I can't believe I just about got rid of it. Here's some pictures of me and my Karen Walker dress. 

Me being interviewed as the 2010 Rose of Tralee

The dress loving boyfriend, Buck Shelford (former All Black with one testicle) and me at Government House.

The beautiful 2010 Auckland Rose of Tralee, Mrs Brown and me.

50th Anniversary of the Irish Club. Me & Jo

Chilling in the garden at my Uncle Jerry's (the Governor-General)

Green for Ireland

The other day someone said, "oh I love the way you style them", so I thought I should show how I wear these dresses with the rest of the clothes. I mean it's not as though I go around in just a dress.

This is what I wore to the first day of the National Irish Feis on Saturday. 

I felt like a fish out of water. 

In the hall it was as though I had stepped on to the set of Gig, there were curly wigs everywhere, stiff, bright coloured sequined dresses all over the place and repetitive music screaming out over the sound system; outside young Irish people spoke in what sounded like rhymes to each other as they watched teams kick, pass, bounce balls in a way I hadn't seen before, they swore & exchanged mocking comments. I felt my ancestors laughing at me as I wandered around unable to find a place to swim, but in the hall I found the water I was looking for; the oratory. 

 

This dress from the stash comes from a chain store, can't remember which one. It's got beautiful butterfly wings on it and I love the colours. It's much better with a cardy and I hate the cowl neck, so nineties. I usually wear it over pants but that would be breaking the self-imposed rules of this challenge. I look so blissed out in this picture, it was the start of the long weekend and I knew that it would be one of adventures. This was the calm before the storm...

 

Friday - Red October

By special request, I wore a red dress in honour of "Red October" the commemoration of the 25th of October the Socialist Revolution in Russia. Click on Red October to read more.

The woman that asked me to wear it is a revolutionary. She is one of many women in my life who are fierce and brave and loyal and hard working and I am privileged to have these women surrounding me and keeping an eye on me.

I didn't take a picture of me in the dress today, first day, sorry. So here is a picture of a picture of me wearing the dress that sits on my mantlepiece at home.

Me and my Papa

The dress is by Carlson a world famous Dunedin (my home town) designer. I love her clothing and never thought I would own one of her dresses. This dress fits so well it is like it was made for me. I bought it at the same time I bought that long lace gown and I wear it often to lots of things. I'll take a picture of me in it the next time I wear it (won't be long) and post it up.

I only have a few more days left of going through my stash of dresses for Frocktober. I would just like to remind readers that I have not purchased/borrowed or found any of the dresses, unfortunately, I own them all. In light of the upcoming final week I sorted out what dresses I would wear for the final few days. Here they are, with the exception of today, all ready to go.

Thursday - The 21st Dress

So this one from the stash is the dress that I actually got for my 21st. Mum said "this is the kind of dress you can only wear when you're 21." At the time I didn't really think much of it, but what I think she meant was, right now, you're really skinny so you should buy this dress because one day you'll be too curvy to wear it. That day has come.

I took these pictures before I went to work and I was so tired. These pictures show a little bit of my wee tummy and my big thighs. These photos were really hard to get; the other ones show every little bump and curve and on advice, I will not be posting them.

It's actually really nice to wear because it's two layers of cotton and it's heavy and stretchy. It can also be worn in a number of ways, halter neck, winged sleeves, low back, tied at the top etc. 

I actually love the top of this dress when I wear it with the winged sleeve, it's just the bit around my booty that's no good. But can you keep a dress just for the top?

Wednesday - The Jackson Pollock dress

When I walked downstairs in the morning wearing this dress my boyfriend went "ooooh, I love that dress, it reminds me of a Jackson Pollock." He's right, it's kinda like an expressionist painting. I got this dress from a second hand store in Levin. It was summer and I needed a dress for the trip and the matching belt with it was too good not to buy.

Today I went to work and then I went to the launch of my friend's beer. He is such an amazing person, an incredibly hard worker, generous with a kind soul and really good at making beer. He made a wheat beer recently (my fav type), it is so good, so so good, it tastes like banoffee pie.

 

After having a beer we went to the art opening of our new Mexican friend, Jorge Satorre, an artist who had been staying with us for the week. His work was beautiful, truly. The piece I am rubbing is a stone from Guatemala. I couldn't stop touching it and wanted to keep it close to my skin. I have a sponsor child in Guatemala who has recently stopped needing my support. To feel a rock from the land he has grown up on was pretty amazing. It was magical. The rest of Jorge's work included tiny bronze minatures of all the extinct New Zealand birds. To see them all, lots of them, perched on a plinth was pretty tragic. The way he had arranged them was as though he had left space for the ones that would eventually become extinct. If you click here you can see more about the exhibition. I wanted to include this quote from the exhibition catalog that I think is rather wonderful and expresses how I sometimes feel when I am engaging with the cultures around me. 

"It is impossible to say what an individual is doing unless we have tacitly accepted the essentially arbitrary modes of interpretation that social tradition is constantly suggesting to us from the very moment of our birth. Let anyone who doubts this try the experiment of making a painstaking report of the actions of a group of natives engaged in some activity, say religious, to which he has not the cultural key. If he is a skillful writer, he may succeed in giving a picturesque account of what he sees and hears, or thinks he sees and hears, but the chances of his being able to give a relation of what happens, in terms that would be intelligible and acceptable to the natives themselves, are practically nil."

Edward Sapir quoted in Marvin Harris, The Rise of Anthropological Theory. A History of Theories of culture, (Walnut Creek, C: AltaMira Press, 1992) 571

 

Tuesday - Over it

When I took this picture I was playing around. My sister said "Fuck you Frocktober" and really that's how I felt. Taking a picture of yourself either before you go to work for the day or late at night after you get home kinda sucks. It's not hard work, it's just not what I'd really like to do.

 

I got this dress from a store in Dunedin. I had wanted it to wear at my 21st but my Mum made me get another one because she said "you can wear that anytime." I bought it a week after my 21st when it went on sale. It's got a really cool pleated chest thing and cord straps. I've worn it to 3 weddings and it's kinda plain enough not to be noticed but 'nice' enough for a wedding. You can see in this picture I'm making a face, I am totally over it, I just want to wear pants.

IOU

I owe you guys a weeks worth of frock tales. I've been writing on my phone & all over bits of paper & of course taking the pics everyday but just been hella busy & unable to get time to upload it all. I figure I should probably keep them in order of appearances so here is Monday's story.

In the past two days I have learnt the true meaning of gratitude.

As part of my job my colleague and I went to a rest home to give a talk about our work. When I arrived I was struck by the calmness and quiet. It was a nice place, lots of natural light and a hair salon and a pool and a cafeteria and an atrium. There were 5 old women sitting in the front row when we arrived 20 minutes early. The two on the end were holding hands.
I suddenly thought of a song Louis baker had played when we saw him a week ago. He spoke about the care or lack of care given to the older people of our community. I wondered if we provide them with the stimulation they need, they deserve.
I decided then to give them every piece of energy I had. I must admit, I had put them in a box, the same box that my grandma lives in, one of racism, for lack of further explanation. During the talk I mentioned that I wore a kirituhi by Derek Lardelli and that I could hear my grandmother saying that "I should leave my cardigan on so not to show you all my tattoo". At the end of the talk I was accosted by a woman who wanted to see my kirituhi. She literally ripped my cardy off my shoulder and her and another woman told me that it was beautiful. I then spoke to a woman called Prue, I told her I liked he t.shirt from Te Papa (it has a colossal squid on it) and she told me that she suffered from confusion and forgetting and she said thank you for telling me where she got her t.shirt from. She also told me that her husband had been in WWII and that she was going to read his diary and let me know if there was anything of note in it. I hope she doesn't forget.

Me and Prue

That afternoon I ran to the train station to catch my friend before he left and to meet his brand new daughter. He arrived rushing and handed my the baby and ran off. It was the most amazing experience to meet this beautiful baby girl, just us, alone yet not, as the busy rush hour train traffic rushed around us. Her dad and mum arrived and just like that she was gone, still sleep, unaware of the scar she'd left on my heart.

Now, I'm sitting in youth court. Waiting for my young person to go up. It's a funny place. For some it is a meeting spot, a place to catch up. It doesn't feel like they feel much shame; but then that's just what it looks like from the outside. Lawyers in suits blend with kids in baggy jeans with bandanas hanging from them. It's a fucked up place for so many reasons.

I am grateful for so many things. Today I am grateful for the experiences I have had & the people I share my world with.

Check out the picture in the background, that's me & my super cool brother.

I got this dress from Glassons, it was $20 and I have one in navy and one in teal. I wear it to serious things like court, talks at Rest homes, to church once a year when my Dad comes up with the Army and to the National War Memorial where I sometimes work.

Me, my Grandad & Nev the Rev - Bomber Command Service.

Me and my Papa - Armistice Day church service

My baby sister took these pictures when I was quickly tying my hair back for today's photo. It's a super cute wee series so I thought I should add them.

Long lace for Saturday.

I love this dress, it's my Dunedin gothic gown, and I love these pictures.
 My baby sister once again got the money shots. 

This dress is by one of my favourite Dunedin designers, Charmaine Reveley. It's also one of my fav from the stash. It's from Carlson which is one of those stores where you feel like if you walk in wearing a Glassons dress they'll ask you to leave. It was on sale and I bought this and the red dress you'll see on the 25th on the advice of a friend. When I got home I realised I couldn't eat for the next week, or three. I had to have this dress, I fell in love with the idea of a long lace dress, for the record, it was before everyone had them, and when I bought it I was a lot skinnier than I am. It's very very bootylicious so I have to be in a brave mood to wear it (even though it's so damn comfortable). 

I wore this dress at a friends house warming and then to a gallery opening on Saturday. It was perfect for the occasion. You can't see it but I can pull up the sleeves with the ribbons on the shoulders and I used to pull it right up and bunch it up with a belt to make it a short dress. No one has ever said that they like this dress when I wear it but who gives a shit, I adore this frock.

Short for Sunday.

I've got frocktober fatigue... finding time to take the pictures and write the dresses seems to be more difficult. This picture was taken late at night and it shows. I got this dress from Glassons for $15, it's merino, which was too hot for the day, has an interesting back and as you see, it's short, good for a Sunday.

For me Sundays have always been about family and friends and doing those things that make you happy. For me that is spending time with choice people. This Sunday I spent the afternoon with a cool young person I have the privilege to hang out with. Hanging with her makes me see the world differently. We spent the afternoon making the lamp in the background of this picture. It's beautiful.

In the background of this picture is Howard Broad, the former Police Commissioner, with a plant growing out of his head. I wish that he really did have a plant growing from his head. A plant of knowledge, culture, with roots that were deep in the land; a plant that grew flowers of children's faces that reminded him of October 15th and the children that he terrorised. A beautiful reminder that every time he got asked why he had a plant growing from his head he had to tell the story of the village he shut down and the families his officers terrorised.

The crowd favourite

I got this dress on my break one day at work. My friend and I went to the Andrea Moore pop up store to look at a dress I had spied in the window but the dress I had liked didn't fit. My friend found this and I tried it on for her. It fit perfectly and a couple of people said it looked good so I bought it. I'm actually not a total fan of the pattern of this fabric and I wouldn't have tried it on usually.

The dress is by Andrea Moore, you'll see in the tag that it is a one off "sample", and has a big not to be sold written on it. I had it for a while before I wore it and I've just noticed it's called The Faith Dress.

When I wear this dress, without fail, someone always comments on it. It's easily the most popular dress I own, I've even had strangers come up to me to tell me how much they love it so of course, this one is staying in the stash.